Nothing feels the same anymore. I started college this semester and it's been horrible. I'm in a program that i don't like, or know anything about (software engineering), which i didn't even sign up for, my parents did without telling me about it. I feel like i've lost every single one of my friends. I haven't been able to sleep right. I don't know what's gotten over me, but it's become really difficult for me to speak. I feel uncomfortable speaking, maybe because i'm afraid of saying something stupid. I used to talk a lot, i used to be happy, used to get good grades, study, the usual. I used to not have a care in the world and let everything flow, i didn't really care much for love or anything, just living and enjoying life. But when college started, everything went to shit. I was in love, but it ended very cold. I told this girl (who was one of my best friends) how i felt, and i got nothing back, no response, nothing. That was only about 3 weeks ago, but it feels like 3 years without this scar healing. I miss her so much. I want to do art, i want to leave engineering, but i feel so shitty that i haven't drawn anything. I pretty much have no trust on anyone but my best best friend, and she's the only one who actually seems to give a shit. I've tried everything that could bring the old me back, i've tried praying, but it pretty much feels like i'm talking to a wall, because nothing is happening, again. I just feel like a piece of shit who can't find love, a good career path, or a way to fix his faith, and i've tried. The joy in me is gone, the love, passion, i feel it all just walking out on me along with everything else that's gone wrong. I miss my old self. I don't know what you can do to help. But a conversation or advice is very welcome right now :'(
there doesn't seem to be anything here